The Queen's Rules - Lisa's Words to Live By

Jun 16

Me in the little chair. Never thought I’d see the day!!! View more Lisa Lampanelli on WhoSay

Me in the little chair. Never thought I’d see the day!!!

View more Lisa Lampanelli on WhoSay

I’ll be on Adam Carolla’s podcast Mon10pPST/7pEST. We’ll be bidding on pics of Kim Kardashian’s afterbirth so tune in! http://bit.ly/159VNJp

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And a special Happy Father’s Day to my Dad! Thanks, Dad — “Lisa” is a much prettier name than “Accidental Leakage”! I love you!!! XO

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Watch me on Inside Amy Schumer Tues 10:30p @ComedyCentral. Most fun I’ve had since I got stoned & went wig shopping with Amanda Bynes!

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Celebrity Father’s Day message: Hey Bruce - Happy Father’s Day to our not real dad! Love Kim, Kourtney & the Big ‘Un!

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Celebrity Father’s Day message: Even tho u loved cocaine more than me, beat up Mom & leeched on my money, hi from rehab! Love, Lindsay

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Celebrity Father’s Day message: Even tho you’re a wacky Scientologist, jumped on Oprah’s couch & likely in the closet, I still love u! Suri

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Celebrity Father’s Day message: “Thanks to you, Dad, I’m a pierced-face, stoned-out, crazy wig-lady. Happy Father’s Day!” Love Amanda

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Jun 15

1 wk from tonight, I’m playing LA’s Club Nokia, 7&9:30p. Get tix at axs.com. I love LA! It’s only city that celebrates ILLEGAL Labor Day!

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Watch me on Inside Amy Schumer Tues, 10:30p on @ComedyCentral. Most fun I’ve had since Michael Douglas went down on me & DIDN’T get cancer!

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